Meet Elizabeth Soos, founder of Auersmont School of Etiquette based in Melbourne and Sydney, Australia. For Elizabeth, etiquette was ‘king’ when at home; her parents had taught her the European standards. Together with self-directed studies, she completed the Train-the-Trainer course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London. To further her education, Elizabeth became certified in Chinese Etiquette with Ms. Joy Koh at Image Avenue. Next, she completed her studies with Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac, based in Paris and Shanghai, for excellence in customer service. And more so, becoming an expert in grooming through Makeup Mode Masterclass located in Sydney.
Elizabeth’s business offers a variety of etiquette services. These include coaching, private tutoring, and group training. She enjoys working with people of all ages, backgrounds and travels to meet her clients all over Australia. In addition, she has positioned herself as an etiquette coach voice of authority, featuring in The West Australian and The Sunday Times media outlets. She firmly believes that etiquette is a life-changing skill, an attainable precious possession that lasts a lifetime. After connecting with Elizabeth virtually, I knew that she would have great tips to pass on to you. See her interview below: Someone mentioned to me the other day when you are a child; no one says they want to become an etiquette consultant, and finding your path to the way there is a windy road. So please tell me, what was your journey like getting into the world of etiquette? My mother expressed to me when I was young that she always wanted to attend Institut Villa Pierrefeu in Switzerland; I always kept that in the back of my mind. During school, I found that history, fine arts, geography, and sport were where my talents lay. I never made it to University; however, I was always interested in working for myself. Post-divorce, I now wanted to specialize in a subject that my family valued highly, which was etiquette. My parents were Hungarian immigrants that both came to Australia at different times. Hungarians, as I have come to know them, are very etiquette conscious. I started putting all the factors together, my mum's mention of Institut Villa Pierrefeu, my knowledge of etiquette, the rise of etiquette schools in the US and England; I thought, I can do this! I started self-studying, and one of the places I started on was Google. I found a lot of conflicting information and then invested in etiquette books such as Debretts. Post-divorce, I enrolled in the Emma Dupont School of Etiquette, went back home to write my own workbooks so I could then teach them to others. Melbourne is just one of the many Australian travel destinations for overseas visitors. So what are some helpful etiquette tips you can pass along for someone who may be planning a trip for business or pleasure? Having been colonized by Great Britain, we have kept to British etiquette. Actually, Australians were speaking the Queen's English till the 1950s! So many of the etiquette traditions Australians have still kept such as being generally polite and using your usual greetings and thanking someone after they have answered questions for you. [Also,] not yelling while you speak to someone and not talking about yourself at rapid speed is a real put-off. Building up trust is paramount. Australians love authenticity and genuineness. Once there is a level of trust, they will share and care. This also should be applied in business. Being on time is expected and noted if there is not a good explanation for being late. Tipping is not necessary for Australia; however, much appreciated. Australians love to joke, have a laugh and shorten names… Do not be surprised when you are given a short nickname. This is something that has stuck with me as an Australian expatriate – nicknaming everyone. A habit that has dissipated over time. So here's something interesting I noticed, it's that you are a tea specialist trained by the Dilmah School of Tea. How important is a tea ceremony and for which parts of the world, when it comes to business? Through my studies, the tea or coffee ceremonies are important to many cultures, such as in South America, parts of Asia, and Europe. It is a time that you give to your friends, acquaintances, and even business partners to continuously develop your relationship with them with an added bonus of food and drink. It seems to be a safe place to express yourself with the embarrassment of awkward moments of silence. Tea ceremonies are a bonding experience with benefits! Perhaps we should schedule our own virtual tea party! Now, you have a lot of experience with Chinese etiquette; are there a couple of specific pointers you could pass on to professional people looking to establish a rapport? Perhaps some respectful gestures you would suggest? Australia has a very large Chinese community, which I find exciting. Rapport building is definitely essential; I thought Australian’s took time, well the Chinese took even more time and care. Generally, they like to be introduced by the host or somebody else and will wait until the introduction is done. When it comes to Westerners – business cards are only for business meetings and during business hours; however, for the Chinese, you can give your business card at any gathering. Showing respect when handling a business is important to the Chinese. You must give your business card with both hands to give it, and it must be bi-lingual. The text must be facing the give. When receiving the card from the Chinese, you must take time reading out loud and talking about the details on the card. [It] must not be put in a bag or in a back pocket; it’s like sitting on their face. If sitting at the table, don’t fiddle with cards or place items on top of it. Here are some ‘No go' topics: Don't complain about China to the Chinese, i.e., pollution, traffic, its infrastructure. ‘Japan’ – Sore spot with China. ‘Taiwan’ – Don’t bring up it being a republic. ‘Tibet’ – Don’t bring [up] or [even] name the country. ‘Politicians’ – Don’t joke or comment about any of them. Great advice so far! How important do you find grooming when it comes to presenting yourself, and what are some “must-do” things someone – of any gender – should make sure they are doing daily? Presenting yourself is very important. Many people have said to me that ‘people should be accepted as they are,’ and that statement is valid. Science, however, tells a different story. We all make a quick analysis of a person, subconsciously, according to psychologists, we all have instincts keeping us on guard and keeping us safe, and that’s why we make nano minutes of judgment. In saying this, grooming is a priority for me. I believe we all should pamper ourselves and see the hairdresser, beautician, get manicure and pedicures, shop for clothing that compliments us and is on-trend... Okay, something very fascinating that I came across is your knowledge about the history of etiquette, for I receive daily emails from “Etiquipedia” that have regular guest posts from yourself; it’s how I came across your business! Which era captures your attention and why? As I said from the outset, I have always loved history. I have been very curious about how humankind has evolved. I came across Maura Graber's Etiquipedia via someone's IG post and how she answered a certain item was for. I think it was a Gilded Age orange holder for the dining table. That captured my curiosity, and then we started communicating with each other, and now Maura Graber has been teaching me so much about how etiquette has evolved as with dining ware and so much more. Just a side note. Maura Graber will eventually open the world’s first etiquette museum… soon I hope, once Covid is not so much a threat. From Maura's passion, I have started collecting vintage items that I use to teach students. I find it an effective teaching tool, and it definitely speaks to [the] children and teens that I teach. What a lot of great information you passed on – thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with The Better Professional. It’s been an absolute pleasure learning from you. Read this article in Better Professional>>
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Three ways to show your child or teen, when shopping with them, is practicing confidence through social skills and dealing with sales, restaurant and cafe assistants.
I receive many calls from parents who are worried about their child not showing manners when they expect them to. I reassure them that children or teens tend not to show manners for parents but will do be perfectly polite when they are with strangers, friends and other family members. Now that we are out of lockdown and we are getting out and about like never before, really appreciating our freedoms. Children and teens have new opportunities to engage with lots of people and practice their manners. How can we guide our kids to showcase their social skills when out and about?
These 3 simple steps can guarantee that your child will be using their manners even when you are not there! Read article in Mum CFO's>> Covid confinement has been a challenging and unusual time for people. To socially distance to keep ourselves and our communities safe has asked us to behave in opposing ways to our instincts and needs. Instead of finding comfort and connection in our social networks and workplaces, we’ve found ourselves isolated and in uncomfortable new situations such as unemployment or juggling full-time parenting with full-time work from home. Confinement has brought many mental, physical and financial difficulties and I congratulate everyone on playing their part to significantly reduce coronavirus transmission.
An interesting phenomenon has been brought to my attention by parents who found themselves spending an unprecedented amount of time with their children during confinement: they discovered that their children had a lot of room to improve their table manners and using new social codes of behaviour. That is spending time on-line and the new way of interacting with teachers and friends. Due to being at home together for a long time and overburdened with work, parenting and household responsibilities, many parents reported to me that they let table manners slide. Instead of preparing and enjoying meals together, they permitted everyone to make their own meals or graze throughout the day. I’ve received a flurry of inquiries from worried parents who want their children to gain social confidence once again. I work with the parents to format a tailored program for their children. Generally, parents will guide me as to what they feel their child or children require, and it appears they usually need to be gently reminded to make sure to use their manners, not to forget social norms, and to use their cutlery correctly. Auersmont School of Etiquette offers one-to-one and group etiquette courses for children and teens… I predict that etiquette classes will remain popular for a long, long time! Read article in Mum CFO's>> The world of etiquette is a constantly evolving landscape, adapting to the ever-changing social landscape. In today's digital age, a crucial aspect of modern manners revolves around how we conduct ourselves online, particularly on social media platforms. Your Digital Footprint Gone are the days when first impressions were solely based on in-person interactions. Today, employers and even casual acquaintances often check social media profiles to gain insights into potential candidates or individuals they meet. In essence, your social media presence has become a digital extension of yourself, a window into your personality and values. Crafting a Positive Online Persona So, how can you ensure your social media presence reflects well on you? Here are some key tips for navigating the digital world with grace:
Conclusion By following these tips and fostering a positive online presence, you can ensure your social media persona reflects your best self. Remember, good digital etiquette is an essential part of modern manners. It demonstrates respect for yourself and others, creating a positive and professional first impression in today's online-driven world. Article Published In: LinkedIn Regina Titelius PerthNow, January 13, 2019 12:42PM Renewed fascination with the royals is inspiring West Aussie women to get etiquette training. Class enrolments are up since Meghan Markle took royal lessons before getting hitched to Harry. Perth etiquette expert Elizabeth Soos runs “how to be a duchess” classes, which include lessons on proper manners and protocols. Her pupils include Germaine Koh, of Fremantle, who said she felt outside her comfort zone at high-end cocktail events a few years ago for her fiancé’s work in Monaco, Italy and London.“ I felt really uncomfortable because the level of etiquette at the posh places we went to, particularly in Monaco, was beyond anything I had come across before,” Mrs Koh said. Not only has she learnt the high tea rules of engagement and other palatial requirements, but the Singaporean-born woman, who is stepping into real estate, was schooled on how to make the best first impression. Armed with the training and a new wedding band, Mrs Koh was ready to mingle with the Hermes bag clique when she again accompanied her new husband for overseas functions late last year. “I was so much more confident at these events compared to my previous trips, I just wish I had done the duchess course sooner,” she said. “To know the proper etiquette is good for everyone, it shows respect to your partner, respect to business. It’s not only a matter of my husband making a good impression but also for partners.” Ms Soos said the royal wedding had helped return etiquette to the spotlight. She said Meghan had gone through a phenomenal transformation in a short period, with royal watchers noting her improvements in how she curtsied and interacted with other family members and the public. “People might think etiquette sounds old fashioned and they think of Queen Victoria or young Queen Elizabeth but etiquette is respect for other people and it goes back to treating people how you would want to be treated,” Ms Soos said. 10 Steps To Be Like The Dutchess 1. A curtsy is a small bob not a swan dive. 2. When the Queen speaks to you, then it will be your time to speak. 3. At state functions wear your tiara to identify you as part of the family. 4. Start your meal when the Queen starts her meal and finish your meal when Her Majesty finishes. 5. Speak to the person to your left side during the first course. During the main course, speak to the guest at your right side. Never the person opposite. 6. At afternoon tea, use your fingers for all foods, except patisseries when you will use a fork. 7. Offer tea, sugar and milk before serving yourself. 8. Hold the teacup correctly by pinching the cup handle. Never slurp. 9. Do not stir the cup of tea like a washing machine, but by using a 6-12 motion. 10. When giving a social card, use hands on each corner with the words facing the recipient. Article Published In: The West Australian |
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